Steven Wright Quotes
Quotes from comedian Steven Wright.
“We had a quicksand box in our backyard. I was an only child, eventually.”
“My theory of evolution is that Darwin was adopted.”
“I won the erasers for all the miniature golf pencils.”
“Anywhere is walking distance if you’ve got the time.”
“I was walking down the street wearing glasses when my prescription ran out.”
“My grandfather invented Cliff’s Notes. It all started back in 1912 . . . Well, to make a long story short . . .”
“I was writing an unauthorized autobiography.”
“I wrote a few children’s books. Not on purpose.”
“If all the nations in the world are in debt, where did all the money go?”
“First time I read the dictionary I thought it was a poem about everything.”
